


Pillows in the Thaw

by Blue_Sparkle



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Delusions, M/M, not a happy fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-11
Updated: 2014-02-11
Packaged: 2018-01-11 22:14:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1178576
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blue_Sparkle/pseuds/Blue_Sparkle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dwalin dreams of Nori and things that never were</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pillows in the Thaw

**Author's Note:**

> sequel to 'Blanket of Snow' http://archiveofourown.org/works/1172958 but can be read on its own

Dwalin had never slept as well as inside of Erebor’s walls now that it had been restored. Something about the mountain he was born in just spoke of safety and comfort, made him feel like there was no danger at all. Of course, then there was the thing about never having slept with his lover by his side for every single night.

Even in his sleep he just _felt_ Nori in his arms, felt the smooth press of the smaller Dwarf’s shoulder against his chest and the warmth of his body safely in his arms. 

It was good, better than anything they had had before, when they did not have a place of their own, when Nori would always have to leave with hurried kisses and apologies, or with Nori lying naked on his bed, watching Dwalin get dressed and walking away with regret.

Now they had their _own_ bed, and Nori was _always_ there in the night.

In his sleep Dwalin tightened his arms around his Nori, pressing his face against his neck and breathing in the familiar scent of his lover’s skin. It earned him a laugh and a gentle squeeze of slim fingers around his wrists, and then Nori had twisted around, escaping the hold that had pressed him against Dwalin’s chest, but still keeping the arms around him. He propped himself up so that he was leaning over Dwalin, looking down at him.

Nori smiled, and Dwalin could see it in his dozy state and the darkness of their bedroom, could barely see the beautiful crinkles around Nori’s eyes though he knew they were there. He had kissed them often enough when he had made Nori laugh, even if it earned him slaps and more laughter.

The softness of Nori’s hair was sliding over Dwalin’s bare skin, tickling as the light strands fell over his chest and collarbone, and then moved with Nori’s motions. Dwalin tried to say something, or brush it out of the way, but he still was too sleepy to coordinate his limbs. There was a soft press of lips against the corner of his mouth, a soft and lingering touch, and then it was gone, with Nori rolling off him and out of Dwalin’s reach.

Dwalin’s fingers reached for where Nori had been a second ago, but he had escaped and settled back to sleep. It had served to wake Dwalin up completely though, something that rarely happened in the middle of the night. He took a few moments to stare up at the ceiling, smiling and feeling the last of the sleepiness leaving him.

Nori would likely want to sleep, but he had never objected to being held while he did so, even if he’d never admit to it in daytime.

Dwalin rolled to his side, hands reaching out for his lover, searching for the warm familiar skin. 

All his fingers brushed against were cold and smooth sheets and a pillow nobody had ever lain on.

Dwalin sat up at that, looking over his bed and furrowing his brow. His bed was quite large, even for two Dwarves, but he was tall and Nori always threw himself around in sleep, taking up a lot of space, he had done it so many times. But Nori usually slept in the middle, right by his side, and he stayed for long enough to warm up the sheets there. Now he was gone.

Nori had slept in this bed before, and just now, too, he had been in Dwalin’s arms mere seconds ago. He had burrowed into the blankets and complained about the cold and the way he hated being sick. He had lain on the beautiful purple sheets, the best they had, completely naked and laughing about Dwalin forgetting his own birthday. He had smiled up at Dwalin first thing in the morning, eyes still bleary from sleep and running his fingers over Dwalin's face. He had hit Dwalin with a pillow and tickled him and kissed him and made love to him in this bed.

But that hadn’t happened, had it?

He had never even been near this bed, or this part of Erebor's districts. 

Nori had lain in Dwalin’s arms, face too pale and eyes closed to the world, blood dried on his stomach and the frozen mud of the battlefield around them. He had been cold by the time they had been found by the others, cold enough for the snow that had started to fall not to melt when it landed on him. He had lain still and cleaned up by his brothers, alone in the small tent, his ice-cold hand too stiff in Dwalin’s. He had lain dressed in simple clothes and all his weapons arranged around him as they had sealed the tomb, hiding him from Dwalin’s view as he watched and didn’t _see_.

And now Dwalin was alone in his bed, the one that had never been _theirs_ , in a house Nori had never seen, in a kingdom Nori only had remembered in its most vague outlines. Alone with only whiffs of the dreams he had thought to be memories only minutes ago.

The sheets were cold and smelled of clean textiles and himself, though somehow Dwalin expected them to smell of Nori and still be as warm as he had been as he stretched out over the cold side of the bed, fists clenching in the fabric of the unused pillow.

It was cold now, and Dwalin desperately wished for sleep to take him again, to close his eyes and have Nori there again, even if he _knew_ it to be a lie of his own mind now. His sleep would only bring nightmares now, he could guess by the way his heart felt as if it had been pierced by splinters of ice.

A weak sob escaped Dwalin’s throat and he pulled Nori’s pillow closer, the one Nori hadn’t even touched ever before. He pressed his face against it, and wept in pain, until the pillow was all soaked and his throat burned from the muffled howling.

**Author's Note:**

> yes well, I had another idea that begged to be written before I even thought it through...  
> sorry?


End file.
